Beauty for Ashes

"To appoint unto them that mourn in Zion, to give unto them beauty for ashes, the oil of joy for mourning, the garment of praise for the spirit of heaviness; that they might be called trees of righteousness, the planting of the Lord, that he might be glorified."—Isaiah 61:3

This verse struck a cord with me as I was reading it in my devotions today. Three words stood out to me the most: Ashes, Mourning, and Heaviness. I feel they describe my life as a Christian, sounds appealing huh? What exactly am I mourning? Why does being a Christian have to feel so heavy sometimes? It's difficult to describe to a person who doesn't know God's love. I feel that I have barely scratched the surface of understanding God's love for me but I also know that if I truly understood his love for me I would be in even deeper mourning than I am now. Although it seems contrary, the way I see it, it's not. I mourn for my past transgressions and current battle against my flesh because I know how it hurts God and others. I mourn because I ache to be closer to God and be in constant communion with Him. I mourn because I desire to be more useful to advance the kingdom of God and I know in my heart I can do more. I mourn for non believers because I want them to know God's love and it’s devastating to know their end. To be in complete alienation from God! How sad when I stop and truly consider that. I mourn for the church today because I know it is not always what it should be. God has given me joy! Just because I am in mourning does not mean that I don't have the oil of joy in my life. I am a child of God and I know full well that He loves me and has forgiven me and desires the best for me. He carries the weight of my sin and took care of my sin forever on the cross. What a gift! The joy that comes from knowing God. The heavy burden isn't the weight of my sin or the need to save myself but it comes from my love for Him and the desire to be closer to Him and that is a wonderful thing. Therefore I welcome this kind of mourning into my life, where would I be without it? In my relationship with God how can there be mourning without joy or joy without mourning. I can't wait to be with God in heaven someday, what a glory that will be! I feel like breaking out into song right now!! Ha ha


"My sins, my sins, my Savior!
How sad on thee they fall,
Seen through thy gentle patience
I tenfold feel them all.

I know they are forgiven;
But still their pain to me
Is all the grief and anguish
They laid, my Lord, on thee."

"Lord, let me weep, for nought but sin,
And after none but thee.
And then I would—oh that I might—
A constant weeper be."
-Charles Spurgeon